Just Because

With the new year arriving soon that means Katherine's birthday will be arriving soon as well. I have decided that leading up to her birthday I am going to share some of the things that I have written about her and some things that other people have also written about her as well.

So, the first thing I want to share is a letter written to me about a week after Katherine's funeral. The person identifies herself, but I feel that it is personal so I choose to keep her identity anonymous.

Her letter in part reads as:

"My heart has been breaking for you all week long. I have cried and hugged and kissed my baby a lot the last few days.

It may seem weird that I am typing you a letter when I hardly know you. But I need to tell you something that happened last week. I saw you at the B track picnic in the park. This was not unusual. I have actually seen you quite a bit this school year. While I have waited in the car for my boys, I have watched you several times coming and going with your children to school. I watched you when you were very pregnant with your baby, and then watched you pushing her in the stroller every time with your little ones in tow. You are very conscientious. You always know where your children are and make sure they are close to you. They seem very well behaved and know not to wander too far.

As I have watched you I can tell you are a good mom. On the day of the picnic, I saw you sitting under a tree in the shade. You had your baby in your arms and would occasionally put her down on the blanket next to you and stroke her head. It was very serene. It was a beautiful picture. I even pointed you out to my husband and said I thought I would go and say hello to you. But then something stopped me. I am not sure what it was. But now as I look back, maybe I was not supposed to interrupt what was happening under the shade of that tree. A sweet mother who was raising her family just as Heavenly Father wanted her to. She was at that moment in the right place. She was where she needed, spending a few last quiet moments with her little girl. Not knowing that the next day that she would be gone. I am glad now that I did not interfere. I got to sit by and watch what motherhood is all about.

These little ones come and go so soon they will be leaving us. We get to he here and take care of them and hope that we are doing a good job and send them on their way. You are doing exactly what you are supposed to be doing. And just like me, there were angels watching you and agreeing that you are a wonderful mother. One of those is your daughter. Someday she is going to thank you. While she was here, you loved her and held her and kissed her and took care of her. You did exactly what you were supposed to do to make her life sweet. Do not ever doubt that! You could not have done anything differently to change what happened. If Heavenly Father wanted her back, he was going to take her. She is so lucky to have spent her life in your family, and He will bless you for that!

I cannot even imagine what you must be going through right now, but I am sure one of your fears is forgetting her. So my gift to you is a memory. Try to remember that day before. Remember sitting under that tree with her. It was a beautiful day. You seemed so peaceful as you watched her lay there. You would pick her up occasionally, I am sure most moms do, because our babies are so beautiful that we cannot stand to not be holding them! Think of that day. And think yes, you did your job. You fulfilled your mission with her, and she loves you for it.

I also want to thank you for giving me some perspective. I am sure that you never knew that I was watching you. But every time that I have seen you, you are an example of the kind and patient mother I need to be. This whole week I have really been able to stop and think about what is most important in my life, and that is my family. This life can be so short. But being able to mourn with you has made me a better mom, so for that I truly thank you."

That is part of the letter that was written and sent to me about a week after the funeral.

Ah, my dear and sweet Katherine how I love and miss you. I know that you are doing really well, you are happy and at peace and that brings me great comfort. Farewell until we meet again at Jesus' feet where I know you are right now. I look forward to the day when I am able to join you there again.